The list?!?!

So one day when I was at my grandma's house during the summer time and I was bored, there was this pad and paper sitting in front of me so I started doodling silly pictures. Then I decided to make a list! I thought about how cool it would be to have a list of my wildest dreams that I wanted to accomplish in life! I like the idea of one day taking it out and realizing I crossed a goal that I've had for a long time off because I completed a dream that I always wanted to happen. Last year I was struggling through life at the time and writing this list helped me believe that one day it's going to be worth it and it will get better that life is hard at the moment but my future will be bright. The list is simply a piece of paper that could essentially just mean absolutely nothing or it could be the one thing that when i look back at my life I say "I knew things were going to change" but it doesn't matter because my thoughts are forever changing and nothing is ever set in stone. My list is truly what I want in life without a doubt if nothing else happens I want these ten things to happen. These 10 things are more than wishing for a million dollars or having the perfect future they aren't things that could be reached in a day or even a year but I know they will be reached someday. Some of these things are completely ridiculous, don't make sense, and just a little crazy but that right there is my life story so why not? I really don't have a number order I just wrote them down as they came to mind, life has no order so neither does my list. Here it is...

Change A Life- I want to impact someone's life the way mine has been impacted, I want to influence people to be better and inspire them to try harder and help them accomplish their dreams.

Meet Justin Bieber- what kind of teenager would I be if I didn't throw in meeting my idol/ obsession/ teen heartthrob come on you know me better than that! I'm still a teenager and I had to put at least one crazy goal in here.

Make A Difference- I want to make the world better for more than just because it sounds good but because it needs to be changed.

Start A Charity- I love charities and having my own would be amazing. I'm not exactly sure what I want yet but I know I will figure it out.

Make A Lifetime Friend- Having and being a lifetime friend is something that I think everyone wants, some who is there for you no matter what and doesn't have to be by your side 24/7 to know how you're doing. Someone who is just there.

Find Out Who I Am- It's no secret that once you become a teenager everything changes and there are things that you need to figure out so that's what I plan to do.

Write A Book- I really want to tell my story to people by writing a book because I know that there are people who may be going through the same things I have and don't know what to do so they can read about my journey and it may help them with theirs.

 Make My Dream Happen- I am not exactly sure what my dream is but when I know I will make it happen.

Find My Purpose- everyone has a purpose thats the easy part but finding it is hard. Knowing is half the battle right?

Be Happy- I want to look back on my life and be able to say it may not have been the easiest but I am happy with the way it turned out and I wouldn't change a thing.

Honestly, like I said before, this may just be a small piece of paper with scribbles and doodles on it that mean absolutely nothing or it could be the one thing I have 20 years from now that is proof of my dreams and who knows I may have changed the world by then, written my book, and just got done hanging out with my BFF justin bieber;) who knows anything can happen. Just try and don't give up and if it doesn't happen then I've still have time:) Plus if I have time I would really love to go to the Ellen Show, that would be super amazing!

Goals of 2013

2013 is finally here and I am so excited for a new year! 13 is my favorite number so I figure that this is my year to make things happen! This is the year that everything changes and things start to turn around for the better, hopefully! Now everyone has their New Year resolutions like " not drinking soda" or " becoming healthier" but this is the year to change:) Change everything, find new adventures, and make dreams happen! The way I see it is things just have to get better so they will! This year my goal is to have fun and enjoy life for the crazy roller coaster it is! In years past I have been worried about what the future may bring but this year I decided to live for today because whats the point of having a future without the past that got you there. Let's just face it I have changed and in the last couple of years it been pretty big I would say, my past has been rocky at times with everything that has gone on throughout the years but I would still consider it to be life changing. So this post is going to be short and sweet like someone I know;) make this your year because I am going to!

Good news!

So I have some good news! As you know I have been participating in the enzyme replacement therapy in Oakland for about a year now. Yes it's been a year and a long one at that but thankfully all that dedication, commitment, and patience has paid off! I am officially on the drug 100%! Yep that's right I'm on the drug! It's reassuring to know that we are flying for a reason now! In order for you to see how exciting this is I have to tell you what I experienced through my eyes... So ideally every week my mom and I would wake up at 3:00am in the morning, occasionally Justin would come with but he wasn't in the study yet so he didn't have to come as much as me. we would go to the airport and get on the plane and go to Oakland for the treatment and then go home. Well that wasn't always the case. Actually it rarely happened, When I agreed to doing the trials I didn't know what I was getting myself into, I knew this was a commitment that I had to take because it could be one of those things that changed my life in a huge way but at the same time I didn't realize how much of it would consume my life and my families life as well. Being a teenager is hard enough to deal with but being a teenager with a schedule that some adults couldn't even handle is 10 times as hard. I didn't know I would be signing an agreement that I would always be behind in school, so tired that I could barely function, or miss out on even more of the high school events that I'm suppose to be doing right now. It wasn't to appealing to get needles every week either, but I did it anyways because who am I kidding it was one of those things where you couldn't say no it was just to big of an opportunity to pass up. Little did I know I would meet some of the most amazing people in my life, have some of the best moments ever, and have a few laughs on this long ride. I wouldn't argue with anyone who says this is a huge commitment, the study has challenged me every way possible physically mentally and emotionally too! It's draining, boring, confusing, sad, stressful, long, demanding, time consuming, painful, and so much more, trust I could go on forever;) but within all that we've became a family like I've said many times before in my blog, now I can't speak for everyone in the study but the Thursday crew has definitely become closer throughout our time together, we have laughed, cried, and looked at each other in complete boredom but without them I don't know where I would be in this crazy mess. Because of the study I've had to give up some of my perfectionist ways, which has been hard, I've had to accept I can't always get an A and that's ok because there are bigger things to worry about but some of that perfection is still in me( I can't just get rid of it over night;) I've had to sacrifice many many things that may not seem like big deals to many but they were to me. Things like going to midnight premieres and being able to say I sat there for hours with my friends or not going to the football games on Friday nights because I am to tired or just being a regular sleep deprive teenager are small things to some but those are the little things that make memories, right? Anyways my point is Oakland has made me miss out on a lot of things but it has also given me many things as well like going to the JB concert there and many other things:) So through it all, the ups and downs, the twist and turns , and the loopty loops I am on 100% drugs in a good way of course! Hopefully they show some improvements so wish me luck!